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You meet someone. He’s everything you ever wanted. You fall in love. You get to know each other, and guess what? He loves you too! Sparks are flying, and there’s magic in the air. You get along great, and as time goes by you realize how much you really have fallen for him. It seems nothing could go wrong, you’re both so in love with each other, you share everything together, you’re like an ideal couple, in every sense of the word.
Then it happened. Suddenly, you feel like it’s just not the same anymore. He’s no longer sweet, and thoughtful, and caring. He turned from being the most lovable person to practically a migraine-causing stranger. You wonder what you’ve done to cause such a change. You labor over endless assumptions and analysis just to explain why things aren’t working the way they were between the two of you. You wonder, does he still love me? You pluck up the courage to ask him, but he just shrugs and avoids giving you a definite answer. You feel more frustrated than ever. And yet, his actions are loud and clear, even though he’s not saying it to your face. The love he once had for you, is no longer there.
You try to deny it. You hope. That somehow, maybe… you’re wrong. That perhaps, he still loves you and there’s a perfectly good explanation for the way he’s been acting. You desperately want to believe that things will get better. But you know you’re not happy anymore. You cry yourself to sleep every night, trying to think of ways to save your relationship. Trying to revive a feeling that was once there but has died a natural death, trying to mend something that you know is broken beyond repair. But then you wake up, and the truth is staring you hard in the face, it’s OVER. No matter how much you try to deny it, his chapter in your life has come to an end.
So now comes the painful process of letting go. You know in your heart that you have to, that it’s the right thing to do, but you just can’t! You love him. You need him. So the natural tendency is to hold on. You tell yourself to just hold on… even though you know his heart doesn’t belong to you anymore. You come to a point where you blame yourself for what’s happening. But it’s not your fault. You need to understand that there are certain things in life that you can’t control. They need to happen because God allows them to happen.
It’s hard letting go of someone that we have loved for so long. It’s painful to watch the people we love, walk away from us. But if they want to go, we need to let them go! It’s easier said than done, but then again love is never easy. It hurts like crazy, and it hurts so bad that we feel like we’re about to bleed from so much pain. No one can truly explain how painful it is, without having experienced it themselves. It’s not easy, and it will take time. But know this and trust in this, IT WILL GET BETTER. The age old cliché, “Time heals all wounds“, may sound boring and repetitive, but it’s true. Letting go allows you and your partner to become the people you were meant to be. You can’t control love. You can’t force someone to stay with you, if you know they’re not happy anymore. What you can do is move on. Believe that there’s someone out there who will love you with everything that they have and in the way you deserve to be loved.
If we really and truly love someone, their happiness should mean more to us than our own. It’s called selfless love. So many lovers in the world are put to this kind of test. Ask yourself. How much do you really love him? Do you love him enough to allow him to go where he’s happy, even if it’s no longer with you? Do you love him enough to allow him to be happy without feeling revengeful or bitter? Do you love him enough to let him go?
Letting go doesn’t mean we need to GIVE UP, it just means we need to GIVE IN… give in to the TRUTH, and learn to accept the fact that we may have lost love, but that doesn’t mean we won’t be able to find it again. Maybe we just needed to love the wrong person first, before we finally love the right one. And when we finally meet the one that’s meant for us, we will know, because nothing and no one can ever take that away from us. Understand this. Only then will we be able to see the beauty of LOVE for what it really is, and appreciate the twist and turns of this journey we call LIFE.
“Then it happened” is the tagline of my romantic history.
this is so true. falling in love is the nicest feeling a person can feel but letting go is the most painful one a person can have. sometimes i wish i don’t have to let go. but the more i hold on and keep them, the more i hurt myself.
I found this post just in the right timing. I had to let go of someone I have loved so much that I can give up everything just for him. But as this post had related, we have to love and let go. For what is true love if you can’t let the person go and choose the person that he really loves most.
If there’s a description way beyond “too painful’ I would want to use that here.
But then again, it happened…
How true this is ,,I love him that much to let go…..
Thanks..this helped me a lot. Came just in time. I’m ending things with my best friend of six years. He meant more than anything in the world to me, I could have given up and done anything for him. But it I truely love him so much that I will let him go and do what he needs to.
thank you. this has made so many things clear to me. i’m in the process of breaking up with my boyfriend. but it hurts extremely…. its a pain i can’t describe. i actually thought he was the one. the ‘right one’.
thanks again though.
omg!!!i cud really relate w/ this one…painful dat nobody cud really expressd except 4 d one hu felt it….tnx
If you love something let it go. If its comes back it will be yours foreever. If it doesn’t it wasn’t ever your to begin with.
what if he made a mistake then you left him…and he let you go…he didnt say sorry please for give me…he just let you go…this is means he nevers love you…i believe letting is just giving up which means he doesnt love you anymore
It is really difficult to forget someone who i really love…
And it is become harder when i see him with another girl…
But i always believe that time will heal my broken heart…
I knew after the fourth year into our marriage that his heart was never mine. All the signs were there. I just chose to ignore them. No anneversary, mother’s day, birthday, or just because gifts. No flowers, love notes, dates, sex, pursuits, or passion. He would always avoid me by going into another room whenever I came to him just for companionship. I was always the one coming to him for intimacy, sex, talk, entertainment. I think that his body is still here but his spirit has long since left. Once he confessed to me after I demanded the truth from him, that he was never in love with me. I was never his “dream girl”. but he’d always cared for me and love all of my great qualities. M. lives and sleeps on the sofa in our garage, while I sleep in the master bedroom. It’s hard to live with this kind of truth. And it is breaking my spirit to hold on to something that is no longer. But I do love him enough to let him go. I know that he will be a better man without me.
When I met Akira, I was the happiest woman in the world. It was a relationship made in heaven. Everything was unexpected, sweet and just… wonderful.
Problems come and we can overcome each one. I though that going through each problem will make our relationship stronger, but i was wrong…
One problem came, and it really shattered him into pieces. But instead of talking about it with me, (& giving me a chance to say SORRY), he decided to give up on me. He told me that he doesn’t love me anymore. I tried…God, I tried to get him back. But he was determined to go on with his life without me. How can he just forget all the things that we have shared together?
Day by day, I try to keep myself busy with my work, my business, my studies & my kids. But at the end of the day I still find myself crying.
I could not accept the truth that it’s OVER because everything happened so suddenly. I am still living in the shadow of the past… our wonderful past.
Yes, in a way I have to learn to let him go. Perhaps he could be a better man without me in his life, like what you said.
For what it’s worth, I learned so many things from our short-lived relationship. He made me happy & he changed the way I live.
This is so true. we feel in love the very first day we met and we have never let go. its been almost eleven years. i made a mistake and and got married to someone i didnt love. He went on rebound, got married and the marriage didnt last even a year.
We found eachother again and we have since been there for eachother. Until recently, when he chnaged. I just dont know what hit me, but one thing i know is that he is not coming back and it hurts really bad. After all the years we have been together, i just dont know what to do. He has not told me in the face but the woman instincts in me is telling me its over..
He doesnt call, and when i call, he is so cold towards me. It hurts really bad because he is the only man i have ever loved. But i agree, if he is not happy with me, i love him enough to allow hi to find love out there. I only wish he would find love and be happy.
But my God, he is the best thing that ever happened to me and i just dont know how to let go of all the years and the memories and it hurts so bad indeed…
just hang in there julie. there’s someone out there for you. letting go is tough, but it heals with time. trust me.
thanks for sharing!